17 ways to soothe a crying baby

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I don’t know what time it is, I don’t know what day it is and I don’t know what the date is. My baby is 3 months old and I am trying every move and sway known to man to just get him to STOP CRYING. If you can relate you might want to keep reading. I have searched for and tried ways to console my crying baby and have compiled them all so you do not have to do all the searches yourself.

To my dearest daughters.

Oh I know how difficult this time can feel. I hope and pray that I can be there for you when you go through this time in your lives. Having a new baby can be so romanticized, or some very lucky people maybe have perfect babies that never cry, I don’t know, but each and every one of my babies cried. and cried. and cried at some point. I can not say that I am an expert after 5 babies, each one was and still are special and unique in their own way.

Prince Lionheart

Was special because he was born with a cleft palate. He had so many reasons to cry, in hospital, having a nasogastric tube for weeks, difficulty feeding, using a special bottle, operations, etc. Through it all, he was such a friendly and courageous baby, Hence the nickname ‘Lion heart’.

Princess Mary

In so many ways felt like our first baby, first experience with breastfeeding as I was exclusively pumping for 6 months for our first born, and I was doubting myself ALL THE TIME. We had a lot of trauma with feeding and this caused her to loose an alarming amount of weight from being born a healthy 4.02kg. She cried A LOT.

Princess Catherine

Had a very speedy delivery that the midwife barely made and this time I was determined to ‘enjoy’ this baby. None the less, after a few weeks I was crying with my baby on my own mothers shoulder, asking why do I get all the unhappy and crying babies???

Princess Amy

Was our 4th born and this time I was certain I could do this baby thing. I had a running bread business and I planned to just put baby in a carrier and go on with life, because babies just want to be with their mothers? So I thought. She cried. so. much. I tried carrying her, I tried putting her in a swing, I tried nursing her as often as she cried, sometimes almost forcing her, she almost never stopped crying. She was such an unhappy baby. My theory is that it was because I never slowed down to enjoy her. She not only wanted my closeness in the carrier but also my attention and presence.

Prince Christoff

Came merely 16 months after Princess Amy and it really takes teamwork to the next level to care for everyone’s needs. Your father, the King, graciously helps so much with all the older children so that I can spend as much time as I need with our youngest. now not even 3 months old. Still, little Prince Christoff has his crying spells. Moments where he will not be soothed. This really humbles me as I thought (maybe) this time I will get it right.

To be a pro and have a beautifully content baby, at least ALMOST all the time. Nope. This is just not my story, and I am starting to think maybe it is something with me and not with the babies.

Even though I do not have the most content babies, I have found some practical things that is either working for me, or is working for other experienced moms.

Why is my baby crying???

Here are some possible causes for babies to cry:

Babies NEED mom’s closeness and attention.
They might be uncomfortable, hot, cold, or have a wet or dirty nappy.
Hunger can cause them to cry when early hunger cues where missed.
Being tired very often can cause babies to cry.
Stomach pain from gas.
Being frightened by noise or sudden movement.
Boredom
Pain from teething, ear ache, etc.

20 Ways to soothe a crying baby

Routine is essential for a baby’s sense of security

A healthy routine or rhythm especially at night is crucial for a baby to feel secure and find and start to practice good sleeping habits. Make a list of things to wind down your day with baby like bathing, reading, singing lullaby’s, turning down lights.

One good habit to establish any humans circadian rhythm (wake and sleep times) is to get sunlight and fresh air in as early in the morning as you (or baby) wakes up and again in the late afternoon as the sun sets.

Try your best to first figure out WHY your baby is crying, this will make it easier to find something that work and spare you a lot of self doubt because none of the soothing methods will work while your baby has a dirty diaper, for example. The most common reasons I have found for baby’s to cry with a hands-on mother is because of being soiled, gassiness and being tired.

1) Hold him close

Pick baby up and hold him or her close to your chest. Speak to him in a calm voice telling him that you are there and he is ok, rocking gently from side to side.

2) Watch yourself in the mirror

Watch yourself in the mirror as sometimes you think that you are rocking gently but in reality it is comparable to a 4×4 ride. Think SMOOTH, gliding movements like dancing.

3) Check diaper

Check and/or change baby’s diaper, checking also for rashes, hair around fingers or toes.

4) Try nursing

When baby is slightly calmed down, try nursing. When trying to nurse when baby is full blown crying they do not realize what you are trying to do. They will have difficulty to latch and when they latch they will probably suck so strongly that they gulp down mouthfuls of air, hurting them on the way down and will cause them to have cramps in a few minutes, (and the ugly cycle continues).

5) Burping

Try different positions to get baby to burp. When they relax the gas will more easily move up or down.

6) Holding in different positions

Holding baby in the cradle position to the left or to the right, swaying.
Holding baby upright over your shoulder, be very gentle with this as your shoulder will press into their stomach quite hard already, be careful with bouncy moves.
Hold baby upright close to your chest, one hand under his bottom and the other supporting his back so he can feel safe.
Upside down cradle (laying with his tummy on your arm) this often helps if baby has a painful stomach.

7) Go outside

Put baby down in a stroller and go outside. Have a sibling push the stroller, they absolutely love it (the sibling) and most of the time the baby also calms down.

8) Water soothes

Give baby a bath.

9) Ask for help

Give baby to someone else for 5minutes. I don’t know why, but this very often helps. Maybe it is the energy that carry’s over to the baby, maybe it is just a different hold that helps the baby to calm down and think.

10) Trusty white noise

Put on loud white noise.

11) Ear buds

Where ear buds to just soften the sound a little. I know my ears can start to sing from a baby crying and it can drive anyone crazy.

12) Take a breather

Put baby down on his back in his crib where you know he is safe. Leave the room, closing the door. Go drink a glass of water, go to the bathroom, splash your face with water, stretch your aching back muscles and say a prayer. Then go back to baby and try again. Sometimes being alone for a minute or two and then getting to be in mommy’s arms again soothes an inconsolable baby.

13) Do not trust your thoughts

REPEAT TO YOURSELF. This will end. He will sleep eventually. It easily feels like the screaming will NEVER end. But we are not rational in that moment so do not trust your thoughts.

14) Squatting

Squatting. Say what? Yes, squatting. For some mysterious reason squatting calms my current baby, I have not tried it with the previous ones. It must be something to do with the up and down movement, but it INSTANTLY calms him!

15) Step it up

Step-ups are another unconventional movement to try, but it works for me!

16) Try something natural

Try a natural colic relief medicine like Colic Calm.

When baby calms down and does not fall asleep in 5minutes, try to nurse him and usually he will fall asleep, exhausted from the crying.

17) When baby really is in pain

When you feel convinced that your baby is in pain, do not hesitate to give him something for relief. I would love to have a more natural option that is effective for pain relief in babies, but I do not, yet. In the case of teething pain, unfortunately there is no one miracle thing that works in my experience. You can try frozen teethers, T-gel or frozen breastmilk icicles. Some babies teethe very easily while others really struggle. Be extra patient and loving with your baby, as long as they feel secure, safe and loved they will quickly go through the discomfort with an even stronger trust in you.

Conclusion

Very important

Have a community that you can lean on. Your mother, a good friend. Anyone that you can ask to come over or at the very least to call and just cry your heart out. Everyone needs it now and again.

Please remember that you are not alone. There are others that struggle just as you are, and some have even worse situations. This time is so short compared to what lies ahead, I know it can feel like the minutes and hours are just too long while you stand with a crying baby in your arms. Be encouraged, this will pass and you and your baby will have a beautiful relationship as they grow. Then you can tease them one day on their wedding day how they caused you sleepless nights.